How is Life “Supposed” to look?

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We all go through those times where feel lost. Those times where we feel as if nothing is going right or not going how it’s supposed to be. I’ve asked myself repeatedly how is it supposed to be? Is there a certain way someone’s life should look? I haven’t come across that answer yet, although I am starting to believe that when we picture what life is “supposed to look like” is when we stress ourselves out the most

Your twenties are exciting and scary all at the same time. Your early twenties are exciting and liberating. This is the time of your life where you meet knew people at school or work. You get to go to clubs or college parties, and start to go out and legally drink. You look forward to Friday nights so you can be with your friends and let loose after driving yourself crazy all week taking 6 or 7 college classes at a time. On top of that you are working a job you most likely hate to keep gas in your car and food in your stomach. At this point you think this has to be the hardest time of your life, only to learn that what comes next is the real struggle.

So you finish college and don’t have to worry about writing 10 page papers and staying up all night to study for a job. Now, life is going to get easier because you have a degree you worked your ass off for! You are going to get that job you envisioned in your mind while driving yourself crazy to keep your GPA up, get an awesome paycheck, move out of your parents house, maybe get married and have a kid or two. REALITY CHECK! Now you have to make a resume that is supposed to stand out among hundreds or thousands of other resumes written by other twenty somethings. If you manage to get a call for an interview and do a great job you end up finding out you don’t have the experience for the position. Well people who decide I don’t have experience, how am I supposed to get experience if no one wants to hire me? Now the bills are piling up because you have to pay those wonderful student loans every month on top of the car payment you have because your car decided to break down right after graduating. Oh yeah, let’s not forget insurance and phone bills on top of any other expenses you might have. So now you can’t get that dream job you worked yourself to death for in college so the paychecks from whatever menial job you are working suck. After the bills maybe you’re left with $100-$200 at the end of the month if you’re lucky. So what money are you saving to move out and have these so called kids?

Every time I open social media someone else is getting married, having a kid, or buying a house. What I’d like to know is where the hell are these people getting the money to do this? I can’t even buy myself a new pair of shoes! Am I “supposed” to be doing something different that I’m not on the same path as all of these people I graduated from high school with? There’s that word again “supposed,” which brings us back around to that wandering question, “what is life supposed to look like?” If my life is supposed to involve these things right now then where is my phone call for that job I dream of? I can tell you that I sit home at night at fill out at least 5 applications every day. I don’t go out and have fun anymore because I am too depressed because I work and have nothing to show for it. So what am I doing wrong? Why do I feel like a failure at 25 years old? Am I setting myself up for disappointment because I think my life is supposed to look like what I see on social media?

Over the past week I have told myself that I am screwing myself up. I am putting that vision of what I am “supposed” to be doing and am “supposed” to have in my head. I am 25! I have a degree, great friends, I don’t do drugs, or party every chance I get so I am on a good path. I do what I have to in order to keep money in my pockets to pay my bills, so what if it’s not the dream yet at least I’m trying! Life is not “supposed” to be anyway except the way you live it! It’s a bumpy ride with a  scary path, but it will all fall into place when it’s your time. Don’t bring yourself down because you see others around you with things you want because a picture on social media is just that, a picture. You only see a glimpse into the lives of your peers not their lives. You may prosper in other aspects of your life where others struggle and vice versa. IT WILL COME! Keep your goal in mind and your loved ones close for support. When your days are filled with doubt reach out to those who share your dreams for some reassurance. Keep each other striving because life will fall into place. There isn’t one way life is supposed to look so don’t screw yourself up with those thoughts because it will only set you back. 

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